“For life and death are one, even as the river and the sea are one.” - Kahlil Gibran

If 2020 did one thing well, it reminded us that life entails painful realities, including death. In 2021, we’re going to be stronger and more aware with our lessons learned with Turnipseed Law Firm in our corner. Turnipseed Law is here to educate us on the significance of estate planning when your voice must be heard in the event of crisis, injury and death. Here’s advice for us all:

In these most unprecedented times where sickness and death have touched every area of the country (and have impacted low-income and communities of color at higher rates), it is crucial to have what some may regard as "difficult conversations" or to discuss things that most might say, "...I don't want to talk about that." End-of-life planning and estate planning has truly taken on new meaning in the age of COVID-19. As an attorney who drafts end of life plans and writes Wills, I like to sit in person with the person making the plans, and also with the person(s) who will carry out those wishes. This may be a couple where the spouses will serve as the other's power of attorney, a parent-child scenario, or even an individual with a trusted friend. Regardless of who comes to the table, I am always reassuring at this first step, and quick to dispel an unspoken fear. 

"Just because you are making these plans, this does not mean you are going to immediately die." And conversely, the failure to make a advanced directives doesn't mean an individual will live forever. So, it's important to flesh out what the person making their own arrangements would want, and that the individual executing those plans has a clear understanding.

I always ask whether an individual would want to be on life support, on a feeding tube, what to do if they are brain dead, unable to communicate verbally, immobile, or in a great deal of pain. As I have seen pictures and heard accounts of frontline doctors and nurses, new angles also emerge, along with new questions - what if you could no longer have human contact for an extended period of time, and your outlook was very grim. What would you want to be your care plan? Considering that your power of attorney may have preexisting health conditions or a family that makes caring for you personally a risk, would you have another place to go for your care? Would you want to continue treatments for your chronic condition such as dialysis if it required you going into a facility 3 or more times a week? Is that surgery you have been putting off now postponed indefinitely due to the hesitancy of going into a hospital, likely alone, and exposure to incurable infection?

The probing list of questions is not intended to scare, but it is supposed to open an honest, culturally-impacted discussion of how a person would like to be cared for if they can no longer articulate their own wishes. While many might believe they know how to care for a loved one, it is important to revisit how to carry out those wishes for healthcare decision making, as well as financial, real estate, and business decisions as well.

After sorting through how a person wishes to be cared for in life, we do need to also plan for the other side of the coin, when death occurs. Whether someone has a lot of assets or not very much to leave behind to relatives, planning is beneficial. Of more means might include a few homes, undeveloped land, an art collection and vehicles, and maybe even intellectual property that will derive royalties and income for years to come. If a person appears to not leave behind much, there may be limited resources for a burial, few assets, but some debts and obligations to cover. For most families, their deceased loved one falls somewhere in the middle. Therefore, considering the costs of burials and a memorial or funeral is an important and necessary step. Many families have had no choice but to choose cremation during the early days of COVID-19, and others have deliberately sought this as a way to lay their loved one to rest. A point I always try to emphasize is that cremation is accepted in many religions, so there should not be any reluctance to consider this as a viable way to transition a loved one. 

Deciding what should happen to the largest asset most will have - the home - warrants a broader discussion. If a home is owned, a Will can describe to whom the home may be left, for what purpose, or whether it should be sold. A home is a large asset and with that, a large responsibility. Leaving a home to individuals who might not otherwise be able to "carry the house" or keep up with its maintenance is a challenge. Converting a house to multiple owners (heirs) may work well, but it is often fraught with challenges. Siblings may not be on the same page as to what the ultimate disposition is for the home, and may not be able to financially support upkeep and renovations in the same way. Often there is a hold out or a person who has to be "bought out" in order for other heirs to maintain a property as a "family home." I try to encourage the person when drafting their Will to consider how multiple people owning a home will functionally operate and whether each of the individuals wants to be an owner in this home. I hear more often than not that a child or grandchild does not have any intention of living in the home or moving back to the area to be a local landlord. In essence, many heirs would prefer to receive the proceeds from the sale of a home.

Seems like a lot to think about? It is, but imagine considering this without a plan and when a loved one has died. The end of life planning - advance directives and a Will - will allow the entire family to live a lot more freely and to approach that unknown time of decline or death with important issues already thought of or at least somewhat in process. Consider it as a gift to the ones you are asking to care for you when you can't care for yourself, and to the people you hold most dear to receive your hard-earned possession. The time to plan for end-of-life is now - be sure you consult with a professional to assist you with this important process.